What do you mean Willie Wonka isn’t real?

Things I’ve learned in my life, but oh that list is long.
If I choose to live in my delusion, well that’s okay because my unicorn doesn’t mind. She told me so.
Favorite movie as a child?
Oh my, now that is a easy one. Willie wonka and the chocolate factory of course, wasn’t it yours? ah those sweet days sitting in our kitchen, third grade it must have been and we had that beautiful wallpaper that ran with five inch strips of fruit . I used to lick them one by one because after all, I was a number one fan and if those little English kids could lick walls! well dammit so could I!!!!,
They never did taste like fruit though, much to my dismay. Oooooh, and I was going to have a river filled with chocolate too…..without Augustus to crap it up on me of course! no chubby little German boys in my milk. All we ever got was Ovaltine at the grandparents house and nestle quick out of the cardboard can with the shiny top at home. I think that was supposed to be childproof but anyone knew a spoon would lift it open. And you had to use a double dose so that a lot of the chocolate would remain in clumps so you got to the bottom of the glass and needed a spoon to pull them out. Ooooh and candy, it was everywhere….I had the candy land game and I stole all the gingerbread boys and lined them on my shelf, like my personal oompah looompahs to wait on me. Gum chewing, well, we had to close our mouths, no chomping like a cow chewing it’s cud or it would be taken away. Then again you only got about five chews out of a chunk of bubliscious before the flavor was gone anyway, and the wad was so big you just had to open your mouth to breathe.
Oooompah looompahs were more fun than the munchkins. They had fun little hair and scurried around and delivered the good stuff. The munchkins only delivered bad news and witches and that one looked like a bully, you know the one. Well I have since met little people, vertically challenged or whatever the proper term was and I even bought a candle from one at work for her child’s Pre-K sale. She was fired and I never did get my $17 candle. Not my money back. She must have been a munchkin. And they were orange. Okay, I can do that too, I did it before with a bottle of self tanner. That crap took a week to wear off.
On winning golden tickets in chocolate bars….now that I don’t believe at all. That is a lie because I buy one ever day and haven’t won anything yet except for a muffin top and that ain’t winning if you ask me.
I have slept in my grandparents bed, but never with them and never all four at once……
But Willie, he exists……he must, he must, ’cause how else am I ever going to get invited to the factory and drink fizzy lifting drinks and fart and not be ashamed? I must get there, I must……
Opening candy bar out of magic vending machine….nope, still nothing.
Damn.

Over the fence

Someday
Gonna make it over
To what I see
Beyond this dream
Already fulfilled.
Bigger and better
And free to be
What I cannot be here any longer.
I know the other side
Will be what I make it
Green and lush
Sea glass to gather
Over the dunes,
Also like a fence.
Footprints in the sand
Leading behind me
As I walk away
Not looking back
To where I’ve been
Just forward to where I may roam.
Over the fence
Jump higher
Ah, here I go
I fly over
I am free.

Chillin

Oh how pretty
See it fall
And fall
And accumulate
And I have to go to work
In the asteroid windshield
Dodging the clueless
That think it is speed limit city
If they have a truck
So I slow
And I crawl
To the edge
Then the plow
Oh dear
Stirring up a monsoon of white.
I put away the snowmen
Doesn’t that tell them
It’s time to go
Like an in-law that stays just a bit too long
Or a party that’s over
But the drunk still remains.
My ode to snow
Alas you must go.
A foot you say?
Oh nay,nay,nay.
But it’s a work day
So I must scoot
And to this ice
I mentally give the boot.
And shovel.

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