The trouble with yesterday

We watched the screen while we lived the tale

Cinderella stories of broken hearts unlike the tried and true

as we crept on eggshells through the days that made

the growing bones and curves blossoming

how we still felt incomplete.

We thought we had the answers

learned from source of glamorous mags

and photos of how it should be

that in the end conflicted with how it was.

We skipped in darkened corners,

hidden kisses that thrilled the soul

from tepid boys who practiced first

on arms and pillows

and blushing we looked away perhaps in fear

of the feelings rising

and the need to be a part of this whole.

Memories of makeup on shelves

as we peruse the lipstick and pink powder colors

trying to be better than we felt on the inside

and we lifted the cologne and inhaled the scent

of the beautiful boy who bumped us in fast paced hallways

yet lingered just a second too long

and the Polo heady in our heads as we sat dreaming

through social studies of prince charming

and being asked to the ball,

as the shrill bell rings reminding us to move along

we exit heavy doors and walk into the maelstrom

as against the grey cold lockers, he’s kissing her

like a known lover

and we feel the mascara that we shouldn’t have on

fall in black raindrops

as the wallflower wilts

under the memories of yesterday once more.

There were no party dresses for the shy

no words of true love for the needy soul,

just the hopeless feeling that life would always be

this dark and lonely place

and I wonder now where that girl has gone

as she stands makeup free yet beautiful within,

where has she gone, that shy tired girl

who dreamed for the movie as a child

and now lives the world of the belle of her ball today.

Do our minds twist and distort the reality,

do we grow stronger through the acts of the life play

and though the Polo brings a smile

it is in sweetness and a hint of laughter….

where are you now Oh Quarterback God?

Do you think of those days in fondness or despair…

but then again

that part of me no longer cares

for I am whole

wise

and more than enough

living this life of my making.

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8 thoughts on “The trouble with yesterday

  1. So much movement of the familiar here. Reminds me of the wisdom in the phrase, “This too, shall pass.” For those days that once seemed overwhelming do pass under the bridge, and somehow we find we are quite the deep river, that we carry all those little ripples even as we are so much more…

    Peace
    Michael

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Homemade truffles, now I know you must be a purely awesome person. Mmmmm…I’m glad your day was super duper special…I’m so happy things seem to be turning…prayers and healing thoughts do work….and truffles help too I might add. Hugs love and kisses to all and again, happy birthday…left another comment still didn’t show…I will email you how to access the WP spam area….different than just your regular spam phone/tablet spam….peace and happy days truffle man😊💜

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  3. Hi Kim
    Living a life of your making? That is what everyone should strive for. Thank you for those words.
    How have you been?
    Hope all is well in Fairyland.
    My apologies for a long silence. Went to Paris (and London) over the summer and I can’t really travel and post at the same time. (But I’m back now.)
    Be good my friend. Send me a few shark teeth. 😉

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  4. This was lovely writing and boy, did my girls LOVE “Pretty in Pink” and it will always be right up there with “Pride and Prejudice” as our favorite “love stories.”

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  5. ha…I’m sure you won often my friend….walking through the mind and reminiscing…and the quarterback wasn’t a very good kisser either….ha 🙂

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