Joy in being

There is in that tiny fragment of a moment

as we become conscious of our thought,

the name for that little emotion that slips through

becoming known as we are aware,

and the feeling as it floods the soul with the river of it all

when joy is the only thing standing at the tip of the tongue,

and laughter is its sound.

We hold onto those moments,

carefully guarding them like a petty child,

yet knowing we need to share and release

but oh how it hurts holding on so very tightly

for fear replaces the joy with thoughts of it being lost,

as if it would slip away from our tiny grasp-

and in holding on we starve the emotion,

the joy starts to become small

so we let go just a bit

and feel it begin to grow once more

learning that this is how it truly must be,

to hand it off to a friend,

to send that smile and the sound of a laugh

like the tinkling of wind chimes as it drifts through the air,

landing softly in the waiting lap of all.

Yes, this is how it must be,

to live that moment in a simple joy of being,

to grow the light

and to carry it forward into the day and night.

With wild abandon

Living this life in the moment

running with the rushing wind

it embraces me like a satin sheet of goodness

with wild abandon

I want to be this face

smiling at the world,

just being in this happy moment.

I download my juju’s

colorful candies just because it’s what I do,

can’t eat the make-believe but I can collect

the bright bouncing images

that make me smile

and I don’t know why

like a game I often have no time to play,

I keep gathering the glittering jewels

for someday soon.

I want to have that shining eyed look,

feeling the muscles as they twitch and burn

and the body feeling so very alive

as the feet touch earth

even when the mind

is high above in the clouds

floating on a drifting wind of bliss.

I watch the clock

things to do in short order

like a cook that ran out of eggs

before the last omelet made,

time to get creative and squeeze just a bit more

of life from these fingers

that one now feels tingly,

is it perhaps it is excited too

by the prospect of the day ahead,

just like any other day-

nothing special but still special

in a what’s gonna happen today mood.

Contradictions of life when we flip the view

and the circus dies away

and elephants roam in a state of retirement

away from the lights and stage,

do they miss those moments of a child’s smile

to see their immense selves,

the magic that through time has drifted away

to less tangible things

like pretty speckled jujus collected

that someday won’t really matter,

do the elephants now feel their feet on grassy ground

roaming happy with this look

of a dog running down a beach,

being free

being somewhere within at peace

like me.

This morning I pulled out my iPad game, downloading my colorful candies-my challenge not to miss a day or you start back at day one, and I laughed at myself because really, I don’t know why I do it, perhaps the constant repetition of habit that I set for myself. Who knows, just downloading my juju’s as I like to call them. And this picture, this face found on the internet just makes me smile-I won a penguin badge today on my new fitbit, says I’ve walked 70 miles and I think to myself wow, me? Collecting badges and things again, but it made me smile.

Reading in the paper today about the circus, took my mind to the idea of the elephants now in retirement somewhere here in Florida, and I haven’t been to the circus since I was a child but I remember the elephants, I hope they have the look of this dog, just smiling and being, perhaps going through their routine of collecting food jujus and swimming, rolling about in happiness and feeling the grass through their toes. Quite a disjointed poem today I know, but hey, it’s what came out so I let it roll.

And I’m still smiling….time to get ready for work….gotta make the soup today (3 cans in a crockpot) should be an easy day, guess I won’t be packing on many more miles before I sleep. Happy Sunday my friends, find that happy space somewhere within, or in the outer perimeters and be at peace. Blessings and love, K of the happy face 🙂

The Falling of Stars

Into the night I move in restless sleep
moon filters in to whisper sweet words on dreaming ears
and I feel you beside me
four years gone, you still speak.
I rise and move through darkened halls
and slip beyond into the moon lit yard,
fireflies hover in jungle gardens
and I know you’ve come once more.

The streak moves through the midnight skies
and I reach out a hand to touch the memory
of days gone by and your essence that lingers
as the stars fall one by one
I call your name softly to the winds
and smile to feel a warm tingle I had never forgotten
the gentle form that leans along my side.

Ashes remain where a soul once stood
yet you tease me still with these private shows,
I inhale the jasmine that scents the shadows
and I hold out my hand one last time
bid adieu to the silent boy
as the clouds move by to block the view
and you walk away silently content,
I know you still hear my heart
that always beats for you.